The Basement Burrow
Thursday, January 29, 2004
 
It's that time agehn

To give my blogroll here.
[Allah is in the House] [The Bleat<] [I don't know] [Instapundit] [Healing Iraq] [iowahawk] [Little Green Footballs] [Rantburg] [ScrappleFace]

Contact me
 
Maeglin list

Clickie.

In the immortal words of Mister Spock,
Fascinating.

Sunday, January 25, 2004
 
"I'll Hit Your Wallet Hard"

To the tune of "Back in Your Own Backyard" by Billie Holliday

Hey you just spat on my shoe
So now I will sue
I'll hit your wallet hard.

You see, my mind's in such pain
All your cash I claim
I'll hit your wallet hard.

Hey that's no longer your shirt
Your house doth revert to your local bank
That is my car, I'll take it far yeah thanks.

You'll find your destiny's fer
The homeless shelter
I'll hit your wallet hard.

*improv section*

Hey you just spat on my shoe
So now I will sue
I'll hit your wallet hard.

You see, my mind's in such pain
All your cash I claim
I'll hit your wallet hard.

Hey that's no longer your shirt
Your house doth revert to your local bank
That is my car, I'll take it far yeah thanks.

You'll find your destiny's fer
The homeless shelter
I'll hit your wallet hard.
 
Bad Pun time

Would a penguin balrog be Dory's Bane?
Monday, January 19, 2004
 
"The AVID's solfège"

To the tune of Do-Re-Mi from "The Sound of Music"

Do denotes imperfect tense
Re the definite article
Me the English word for zU
Fa for 1 the numeral
Sol's hue marks CBS vo-
la is the affirmative
tI the s'fix for plural
That is the AVID's solfège!
 
Bad Pun Time

Did you hear about the hog that got into the needles and pins? It was a pig in a poke.
Monday, January 12, 2004
 
If the BBC had been at the Pelennor

Witch-King “Slain”

Minas Tirith -- The Lord of the Nazgûl was reported “slain” Thursday March 15 at the Pelennor Fields just outside Minas Tirith. Witnesses say that Lady Éowyn of the Rohirrim “threatened” the chief of Sauron’s Nine Ringwraiths and “challenged” him. They say he “told” her that no living man may “hinder” him, at which point she “revealed” she was a woman. It is reported that she “slew” his mount and they “fought” until a Halfling, Meriadoc Brandybuck, “struck” at the Witch-King’s knee whereupon he “collapsed” and Éowyn “slew” him. Éowyn and Brandybuck were unavailable for comment; both are reported to be “badly wounded.”

Our embedded journalist Ilmendol reports that thousands of Rohirrim, Gondorians, and Rangers were slain, including King Théoden of Rohan, Lord Forlong of the Lossarnach, and Halbarad, “King” Aragorn’s standard-bearer. “This war is a quagmire,” Ilmendol said. “And what of those Halflings Faramir met at Henneth Annûn?”
 
Bad Pun Time

Did you hear about the abandoned birdfeeder? It went to seed.
Tuesday, January 06, 2004
 
"To D'nI"

To the tune of "The Bunny Song" by Visher and Nawrocki

To D'nI
To D'nI
I am going to D'nI
Former home of my mom and my dad
Down in D'nI
To D'nI
To D'nI
Yeah I'm going to D'nI
All that's useful that I could have is in D'nI

After Keta died I left presently
I'm going to D'nI my fortune to seek
Age Writing is going to be my way
I'll Write many Ages for all of my days
'Cause 'twill be hard work I
Left Aitrus with that fool
Half-divine I be and
THAT IS JUST PLAIN COOL!

I don't got much schooling
I don't got no money
But I am an Age creator of the D'nI
I don't got humil'ty
I don't like them bunnies
But I am an Age creator of the D'nI
I don't got no sanity
My mind is quite runny
But I am an Age creator of the D'nI
My Ages ain't stable
That ain't very funny
But I am an Age creator of the D'nI

To D'nI
To D'nI
I am going to D'nI
Former home of my mom and my dad
Down in D'nI
To D'nI
To D'nI
Yeah I'm going to D'nI
All that's useful that I could have is in D'nI
 
Bad Pun Time

The most militaristic of birds are not the hawks, but the war-blers.
Monday, January 05, 2004
 
Bad Pun Time

Batman would not make a good card game player. He'd pull out the handcuffs upon finding a joker.
 
On the other flipper…

People paying last respects to a fallen hero.
 
Another MoveOn.org ad whitewashing Hitler

Clickie.
Saturday, January 03, 2004
 
"Frodo Baggins"

To the tune of "Yankee Doodle"

Frodo Baggins went to Mordor
With two other halflings
Why they went that way was simply
To destroy the One Ring.

Frodo Baggins, don't give up
Or vile Sauron will win;
With Sméagol watch your step
Or war's lost ere it begins.

Frodo and I went to Crickhollow
With Merry and Pippin
Found the Nazgul tracking us
So that they could turn us in.

Frodo Baggins, don't give up
Or vile Sauron will win;
With Sméagol watch your step
Or war's lost ere it begins.

We stayed with Iarwain for some days
Then stopped in a two-horse-town
Then we were chased to Weathertop;
We nearly lost on that down.

Frodo Baggins, don't give up
Or vile Sauron will win;
With Sméagol watch your step
Or war's lost ere it begins.

At the vale of Imladris
We debated what to do
With Frodo Baggins' deadly trove;
Declared its time should be through

Frodo Baggins, don't give up
Or vile Sauron will win;
With Smeagol watch your step
Or war's lost ere it begins.

Gandalf and a Balrog fell down
And turned the bridge to powder
Then Boromir's horn rang out like
Saradoc's but 'twas louder.

Frodo Baggins, don't give up
Or vile Sauron will win;
With Sméagol watch your step
Or war's lost ere it begins.

Then we met a hobbit by
Isildur's Bane tormented
Got him to show us a way
Frodo thought he'd repented.

Frodo Baggins, don't give up
Or vile Sauron will win;
With Sméagol watch your step
Or war's lost ere it begins.

He sent us to get caught in
An acromantula's lair
And then I had to save Frodo
From orcs who might not him spare

Frodo Baggins, don't give up
Or vile Sauron will win;
With Sméagol watch your step
Or war's lost ere it begins.

We dressed as orcs and then made a
journey to Sammath Naur
Frodo claimed the Ring; Gollum
Took the Ring to the fire.

Frodo Baggins, don't give up
Or vile Sauron will win;
With Sméagol watch your step
Or war's lost ere it begins.
 
Sharkey Arafish is Saruman!

Come on! Both worship power, both are full of malice and hatred, both whip people up into genocidal manias with cock-and-bull stories about "stolen" land and bogus massacres, and neither brook any dissent.
 
Bad Pun Time

The Islamofascist bloc is hard to knock off.
Thursday, January 01, 2004
 
MIWDBD!

I got Uru yesterday but it won't run properly. Pending updates…
 
Oh! I almost forgot!

Happy new year!
 
My Blogroll

For some reason, Blogger eats my blogroll. So here is my lyst of links.

[Allah is in the House] [The Bleat<] [I don't know] [Instapundit] [Healing Iraq] [iowahawk] [Little Green Footballs] [Rantburg] [ScrappleFace]

Contact me
 
Bad Pun Time

Would you say that teleDan mushroomed?

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